


Your Sweater

by kinggyu



Category: SEVENTEEN (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Angst, M/M, Original Character(s), Songfic, it hurt writing this i'm sorry
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-28
Updated: 2020-08-28
Packaged: 2021-03-06 16:54:08
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,559
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26162221
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kinggyu/pseuds/kinggyu
Summary: How would you feel when something that was once shared by you and the person you like feels like it is now being passed onto someone else. To Jisoo it feels like slowly sinking and sinking in a dark void with no escape except just embracing the cold darkness.[or: a cheolsoo songfic with conan gray's heather]
Relationships: Choi Seungcheol | S.Coups/Hong Jisoo | Joshua
Kudos: 15





	Your Sweater

**Author's Note:**

> okay the summary isn't as deep as it sounds ghkfjdhh anyway, i just discovered this song a few days ago and while i don't particularly relate to it the lyrics just felt so sad and thus the creation of this songfic. whoever watches 2gether the series heh this was supposed to be lowkey inspired by the main characters from that bl series but idk just wanted to experiment with songfics with cheolsoo.
> 
> this isn't proofread but i rlly just wanted to share this so yep sorry for typos or grammar mistakes !!
> 
> uhh enjoy i hope? and sorry?

_ I still remember the third of December, me in your sweater _

_ You said it looked better on me than it did you _

_ Only if you knew how much I liked you _

_ \------ _

Jisoo and Seungcheol have been friends ever since. They have been in each other's firsts. 

The first time Jisoo rode a bike, gaining wounds in the process. The first Seungcheol got a failing grade in his math quiz. They sat by the curbside, Seungcheol sobbing quite uncontrollably as Jisoo silently sat beside him comforting him and rubbing his back. The first time Seungcheol had a boyfriend. Jisoo would watch as Seungcheol chatted excitedly about how adorable he was, gushing at how his boyfriend looked. The first time Seungcheol felt heartbreak. Jisoo sat in front of him in their favorite diner, watching as the other would lifelessly move around his fries.

You could say they are two peas in a pod, or maybe that they were joined by the hip. You would rarely see these two apart from each other.

On that chilly December day, they were sitting in their usual spot near the university field. For some reason, Jisoo was only wearing a shirt, although the material was quite thick it still wasn't enough to make him warm. As Seungcheol was about to grab a fry from Jisoo's tray he noticed how the other was subtly rubbing his hands on his arm to stay warm.

"Hey, here." Seungcheol starts to remove his sweater. Jisoo watches him before realizing just what his friend was doing. "Hey no! It's okay!" he retorts but was a tad bit late as Seungcheol was already shoving the sweater towards him. "No, shh. You're  _ freezing _ " he wasn't, just a  _ bit _ chilly. "Besides I'm also wearing a long sleeve" he reassures as Jisoo gives him a look. 

He sighs anyway as he wipes his fingers with a napkin. Grabbing the sweater he places it over his head and pulls it down. He catches a whiff of Seungcheol in the process. That scent, something so calming and soothing. That one smell where just one whiff would instantly transport you to some warm cabin where you're sitting by the warm fire with your loved one. 

"See! It even looks better on you" he compliments and smiles at Jisoo with that gummy smile of his. 

As Jisoo got home that day he sat at the edge of his bed staring blankly at the wall. He looks down at the sweater he was wearing. Raising a hand to examine it a bit more. The strands of wool jutting out, the softness of the fabric, the smell of its owner. 

He brings it up to his nose and smells it. His eyes closed and his heart felt a bit heavy. He hated this feeling.

He hated every single time he felt like this. Where his mind would just mindlessly travel through the memories he had of Seungcheol. 

He hated how every time, he would let his mind do this to him. Accompanied with his heart hurting and his tears letting loose. 

He laid down on his bed, hand still clutching the front of the sweater and letting his senses basking in the scent of his best friend. He felt the familiar roll of his tears as it fell on the side of his face onto his sheets. 

_ \------ _

_ But I watch your eyes as she  _

_ Walks by _

_ What a sight for sore eyes _

_ Brighter than the blue skies _

_ She's got you mesmerised while I cry _

_ \------ _

When they were in 8th grade, Seungcheol came out to Jisoo. They were walking home when he came out and said he may be bisexual or pansexual, this was a few months after he broke up with his first boyfriend. They stopped walking to hug each other, Jisoo whispering how happy he was for him and how he would always accept him no matter what.

"I think I like Yoona" Seungcheol whispers to him as they were in the library. It was finals week, the time where they temporarily live in the library. Jisoo stops reading his textbook and looks up at his friend. 

He wasn't really surprised. He watched his friend go into relationships every now and then. 

Jisoo threw him a confused look. "The new recruit in our club. She's so cute." Seungcheol gushes and Jisoo scoffs at him. "I got her number!" he adds and waves around his phone. Jisoo nods at him and shakes his head. He goes back to his readings but from the corner of his eyes he sees Seungcheol using his phone, probably chatting with Yoona. 

"Hey, don't forget about our finals" he reminds him and taps the other's phone with his pen. Seungcheol laughs silently and says yes as he goes back to typing, and smiling down at his phone. 

It was the third day of their hell week. They were by some tree near the field studying.

"Seungcheol" a soft voice speaks. Jisoo looks up to see a girl, she had medium length hair and a cute little button nose. "Yoona" the other responds smiling at the female. So this was Yoona. 

They chat for a bit, about some club event they were apparently both part of. Jisoo watches the two of them, hooked with the way they looked at each other. It would be quite obvious to any outsider who sees their gazes that they like each other. 

After a while Yoona bids Seungcheol goodbye, saying she has class. She meekly says ‘bye’ in her cute voice,, bowing slightly towards Jisoo and then shyly waves at the other who in return gives her a sweet smile. Seungcheol watches her walk away as she walks past them towards the school building.

Jisoo returns his attention back down at his notes. It was obvious, so very obvious that his best friend was smitten with the girl. Jisoo knew the signs, very familiar with all of them at this point that he never misses it. For some reason, this time it feels so much greater. And that painfully familiar weight on his chest just seems heavier.

Over the next few weeks, he would have lost count over the time he had seen the two together. By the hallway, Seungcheol leans against the wall as Yoona clutches her notebooks in her arms standing in front of the other. The aura surrounding them is light and sweet. Jisoo watches from afar before finally walking down the hallway leaving his friend behind. 

The other time, Jisoo was sitting by their usual spot in the field near  _ their _ tree. Plucking the strings of his guitar mindlessly, playing a random tune. He felt the need to look up, only to be met by Seungcheol and Yoona walking out of the building. Seungcheol evidently holds her bag for her as they chatter away, laughing every now and then. Jisoo watches as they walk across the field.

He closes his eyes, for his own sake. The more he saw them the more he just felt like sinking and sinking down a void. Looking up at the sky, the blue sky staring back down at him. A stray tear leaves the corner of his eye, and him convincing himself it was because of the brightness of the sky. 

_ \------ _

_ Watch as she stands with her, holding your hand _

_ Put your arm ‘round her shoulder, now I’m getting colder _

_ But how could I hate her, she’s such an angel _

_ \------ _

After a few months, they ended up together. Jisoo deemed it as inevitable anyway. 

They still hung out with each other every now and then. Playing PUBG in Jisoo’s dorm with Seungcheol carrying the other most of the time. On a nice day they would play foot volleyball in the nearby park, Jisoo losing by a few points leading to him treating the other with his favorite ice cream. 

These were Jisoo’s favorite times. Because he was with Seungcheol.

Of course that was not all the time anymore. 

Seungcheol wanted to formally introduce Yoona to him, which also means he’d have to be a third wheel for a few hours. He was told to meet the two by the local diner.

Jisoo turns the corner, hating how his eyes just immediately spot the two. More specifically how they stood by each other’s side, Yoona holding onto Seungcheol’s hand as she looked up at him. The two of them smiling sweetly at each other. 

Mustering up courage to continue walking towards the diner, Jisoo takes a deep breath. Not even halfway Seungcheol already notices him and yells. Yoona looks back towards Jisoo, smiling like an angel. He won’t disagree that Yoona definitely was beautiful, if he didn’t like Seungcheol he would’ve said he’d understand why Seungcheol liked her so much. Except Jisoo thinks Seungcheol was prettier than her.

“Yoona, this is Jisoo, my best friend” Seungcheol introduces and the two bow to each other. “I finally get to meet the girlfriend” Jisoo comments and they both laugh, even blushing a bit. “And I finally get to meet the infamous Hong Jisoo,” Yoona replies and giggles. 

“Let’s go?” Seungcheol asks and the other two nod in response. They sit on one of the booths with Jisoo sitting in front of the two. After telling the waiter their usual order they chat for a bit, Jisoo asking them how it has been.

If the same question was to be asked to him, he’d shamelessly say he feels like shit. Absolute shit. 

As Seungcheol narrates a story, which Jisoo honestly does not care for, he mentions his girlfriend’s name making him put his arm around her shoulder and squeezing it a bit. Jisoo can’t help but to stare only at his arm on her. He had to force his eyes to look away, which in his defence was a hard thing to do.

“Oh yeah, the end of the term concert is next week right?” Seungcheol asks Jisoo and the other looks up at him, cheeks full and eyes wide as he nods his head. “We should go!” Yoona excitedly says. Seungcheol agrees and starts to brag about how Jisoo is the greatest guitarist and artist he knows of. Hearing him talk so highly of him makes him shyly look down at his food and shake his head.

Jisoo and Yoona stand outside the diner as they wait for Seungcheol to pay for their meal. A cold breeze passes the two causing Jisoo to shiver a bit. “Hey, you okay?” she asked him. They hear the bell hanging from the door jingle as Seungcheol walks up towards them. Jisoo watches as Yoona playfully scolds the other about how long he took and how Jisoo was already getting so cold because of him. 

“I’ll go ahead, thank you again. It was very nice to meet you” Jisoo smiles at Yoona who smiles sweetly back at him. He nods at Seungcheol, the latter throwing a small ‘text you’ to him as he wraps his arm around Yoona and walks the two of them towards his car.

He gets back to his dorm, not even bothering to open the lights. He sits on his bed, basking in the light of the moon peeking through his blinds. The night went well, except Jisoo wanted to hate it so badly. Wanted to hate Yoona. But no matter what he can’t bring himself to hating the female. 

She was perfect in every single aspect. The perfect student, always getting good grades, helping the professors and her fellow students. Always there to help anyone and everyone, no matter who it was. The perfect girlfriend, making Seungcheol happy. 

She had perfect hair, the type that let Seungcheol run his hands through it smoothly. She had the perfect skin, smooth to the touch as Seungcheol holds it in his hands. She had the perfect height, perfectly aligning with Seungcheol’s chest allowing her to hear his heart beat. The perfect height for Seungcheol to easily place a soft kiss against her forehead. 

He laid down on his bed feeling defeated. Feeling empty. 

_ \------ _

_ Why would you ever kiss me? _

_ I'm not even half, as pretty _

_ You gave her your sweater _

_ It's just polyester, but you like her better _

_ Wish I were Heather _

_ \------ _

**_yo, good luck! tho i know u don’t need it >:D but still break a leg best friend lol_ **

Jisoo reads the text message from backstage. Tonight was the end of the term concert, something to celebrate the end of finals and every student’s hell week. In the three years they have been in university the concerts have always felt the same. This year was different. For one, he isn’t with Seungcheol through the whole concert. Second, he was actually going to perform.

He had always loved to play the guitar and to sing. Ever since he was a child it felt like the only means of escaping reality for Jisoo. 

“Jisoo! You’re up!” the stage manager pats him and he nods back, standing up and picking up his guitar. Walking up the stage, he slowly starts to feel his heart beat faster. He didn’t know if it was because of stage fright or because he knew Seungcheol would be watching him from somewhere in the crowd. 

The host introduces him and calls him to the center of the stage. The cheers from the students are deafening, as he smiles trying to keep his cool. He sits down on the stool and adjusts the microphone. 

“Hi. I’m Hong Jisoo from Political Science. For tonight, I’m going to sing Heather by Conan Gray.” he starts and the crowd cheers and claps. “Uh, I dedicate this to,” he starts looking at the crowd for that familiar mop of hair. “A very special person.” he continues locking eyes with Seungcheol. Yoona who is beside him, waving at Jisoo and smiling up at him. 

_ She’s wearing his sweater, wow. Just amazing. _

He clears his throat and positions his guitar and starts to strum the notes of the song. In the middle of the first verse, one by one the students start to raise up their phones with the flashlight on and sways it to the rhythm of the song.

_ Why would you ever kiss me? _

_ I’m not even half as pretty _

_ You gave her your sweater, it’s just polyester _

_ But you like her better _

_ Wish I were Heather _

Jisoo recites every word from the song while staring straight at Seungcheol’s eyes. At first Seungcheol smiles at the singer until after the end of the chorus. It felt like he wasn’t just singing the song anymore. As Jisoo reaches the bridge of the song his voice softly quivers, still keeping his gaze locked with his best friend. At this point, Seungcheol looks at him with a sense of realization on his face.

_ Why would you ever kiss me? _

_ I’m not even half as pretty _

_ You gave her your sweater, it’s just polyester _

_ But you like her better _

_ Wish I were _

He sings the last verse softly. Afraid if he sang it with his whole heart it would just spill in front of all these people. In front of his best friend. In front of Seungcheol. He finishes the song and everyone around him cheers, but it’s not like he hears them. His mind and body is just preoccupied by Seungcheol. Their gazes unwavering as the lights slowly dim. 

  
  
  


**Author's Note:**

> i hope u guys are okay after reading this hgkjfdhdk if u would like please do scream at me at the comments or maybe at my [twitter](https://twitter.com/ayyojosh) hehe ily i hope u are doing fine and have a nice day or night wherever u are ♡


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